What are we talking about today?

I'll get back to theme days once I find a groove of posting regularly. In the meantime, most of my posts are about some variation of books, bikes, buses, or Broadway. Plus bits about writing, nonprofits, and grief from time to time.

This blog is mostly lighthearted and pretty silly. It's not about the terrible things happening in the world, but please know that I'm not ignoring those things. I just generally don't write about them here.

18 November 2010

Job Search

Today's guest post is from my friend Kathryn, another one from Lubbock. (I do have friends outside of Lubbock, but thus far none of them have answered my pleas for a guest blog post.) Kathryn and I have many interests in common (including, but not limited to, our sci-fi geekiness), and I often say that I'm going to be Kathryn when I grow up, because of the frequency with which she says aloud what I am thinking. It's really pretty fun for both of us (or so she tells me).

Kathryn shares with us today her thoughts as an almost-empty nester.

Job Search

I’ve been e-mailing back and forth with a photographer friend to set up a time for a “Senior picture” for my family. With the girl-child a senior in college, the boy-child a senior in high school, and both parents now card-carrying senior citizens, it seems a perfect time to capture the moment forever.

It is also a time to ponder. I’ve been a mother for over 22 years now. For 22 years, when I signed the IRS tax return, I entered “mother” on the occupation line beside my signature. As an adoptive mother, I could not forget that two other women gave me their children, trusting that I would do a better job mothering them than they could. I read and researched to be worthy of that trust. I worked to give our children a home that allowed growth and messes, and not a showplace that stifled creativity or mad-scientist moments of discovery. Without the assumptions of shared genes, it was easy and exciting for me to stand back and discover along with each child what made them tick and who they wanted to be. I have grown and matured just as much as they have; laughing, crying and praying every step of the way.

And now we three – my son, my daughter and I – find ourselves asking the same questions of life and living variations of the same life theme: What do I want to do with my life? What do I want as my job? What is my purpose now?

Just as their birthmothers handed the babies over to me, I must now hand my children over to God to finish parenting. He most certainly can do a better job than I. And I must stand back even further to allow Him to guide their growth without my interference. Trust is still a major issue, but the focus is now changed to how much I trust God.

As I lay the fruits of my labor, the sacrifice of my handiwork, my children, at His altar and walk away, I am also aware that I am placing the burden of my future into His hands, too. I am weary and fatigued from 22 years of a 24/7 job, but I have grown accustomed to having a rich life’s purpose. My usefulness must now be out-sourced, the momma bear must now hibernate. Now, no longer the mother and feeling like a war-scarred veteran, my job is to become the child again and walk the road of discovery, the object of His perfect parenting. I hope I make my Father as proud of me as I am of my amazing children.


Unknown said...

A fascinating thought, Kathryn.

alisa said...

Kathryn, I found myself in the same situation many years ago. I had a senior and a senior also! All these years later, I have a great job that I love.

Being an empty nester was the hardest thing I had to "accept"---but trust me on this....it won't be long until you and hubby are so happy to see them and looking at your watch wondering if it's time for them to leave! (In a loving way of course.....)

Loved what you wrote about being an adoptive parent. I am not, but I love knowing we moms share so much even though we didn't start the same.

Su said...

I'm glad you both enjoyed this post! I'm so glad Kathryn shared it with us.