Best Books of 2017

Better late than never: the top books that I read last year. As should be evident if you've read any of my book posts, my loving a book is no guarantee that you will. (Although these are pretty good ones.) Please note that these aren't necessarily books published in 2017, but rather books I read in 2017. I'm not that fancy.

I only read 23 books in 2017, so it was not a huge or even normal year for my reading, but what I lacked in quantity was made up for by some pretty great, thought-provoking stuff, some of which everyone needs to be reading right now.


So, here we go. All images are from Goodreads:

3. What the Living Do: Poems, Marie Howe
I forgot until I re-read Dash and Lily for Christmas that it was them who pointed me in the direction of Marie Howe. And I'm so glad they did. Magnificent, beautiful poems about the nature of life and death. IIRC (I read it early in the year), it's not entirely PG, so be warned if you decide to read.

2. Demagoguery and Democracy, Patricia Roberts-Miller
I saw this author at the Texas Book Festival! Because, full disclosure, I sat in her class for a semester back in 2010 (and got an A, by the way) and we're friends on Facebook, and I get to enjoy the benefits of all the things she writes down on a daily basis.

Anyway, this book. Obviously, it's timely, but its importance lies in the tools it gives the reader for spotting and pushing back against demagoguery. I read it on the plane home from Austin and the next day handed it to a coworker to read. Which I would do for you, too, if you were within book-handing-to distance. Read it.

1. Gospel of Freedom: Martin Luther King, Jr.’s Letter from Birmingham Jail and the Struggle That Changed a Nation, Jonathan Rieder
Speaking of timely. If you've never read Dr. King's Letter, there's no time like the present. This book is a great way to do that, especially for those of us who didn't live through it, because it provides historical context. Also, lots of great photos. It took me twice as long as it should have to read it just because I couldn't stop staring at the photos.

It's fashionable for some at the moment to claim that protest itself can be as bad as the injustice that is being protested. Have a read of this book to see that indeed, nothing is new under the sun. Dr. King has a strong message for those folks, alongside his encouragement for those who stand up against injustice for what they believe to be right.


Shorter list than usual, but it was a short reading year. Want to see more of what I read? Let's be friends on Goodreads and you can check out my 2017 shelf.

In the Flowers

After I blogged about (metaphorical) weeds potentially choking out the more desirable things of life, more thoughts arrived, as they are wont to do. For instance: What is a weed?

Broadly speaking, anything I don't want growing in my garden is a weed. But why is it that we plant daisies on purpose but not their cousins the dandelions? What characteristic does clover have that makes it a nuisance rather than a welcome friend? 

Some folks see these and race for the weed killer.
I see them and rejoice, especially when the bees are at
work around them. Source: Andre vd Meulen
on freeimages.com.

Context plays a role, of course. My parents' house is surrounded by farmland, so my mother can't grow morning glories, which are aggressive and will attatch to anything taller than themselves, like handy stalks of corn. They're a nuisance to farmers not only because of potential lost crops, but also because their vines will wrap around equipment during harvest and cause breakages. Morning glories are gorgeous and wonderful in the city or in the forest. In farmlands, they're destructive.

By the same token, a good thing in my life may be a weed in yours, and vice versa. I guess the problems really begin when we look round at other people's gardens and see them proudly cultivating their weeds. "Why would anyone want to grow that?" I wonder, or worse, "They let the weeds overrun their flowers," when in fact said weeds are the flowers, and I just can't see it. And from there it's only a short step to seeing the presence of weeds as the presence of a moral failing and the absence of virtue. 

This plays out quite literally in places where some folks are, shall we say, zealously devoted to the care and maintenance of their grass while the neighbours are, shall we say, less devoted. And so the dandelion seeds float from one lawn to another, while one resident is oblivious and another is indignant. I'm convinced this is why HOAs happened. For some folks, it was surely either that or start a dandelion war. 

But in our lives the weeds and flowers are less literal and the misunderstandings that arise even more fraught. No one wants anything they've spent time and careful attention on--be it a school accomplishment, or a work project, or a new skill, or a creative endeavour--to be treated like a weed. And I hope no one wants to be the person who treats others' precious flowers with such disregard. (Please keep that in mind the next time you're tempted to ask, "What are you going to do with that??" of your college-aged relatives.) But it happens to the best of us from time to time, and flowers get trampled and hearts get bruised.

What to do? Apologize, with all sincerity. Forgive (even though it takes time). Learn from the mistake and use that new knowledge to see with different eyes. Stretch the definition of a flower and shrink the definition of a weed, and see where that takes you.

Cultivating great things in my own life is important, but to recognize it in someone else's life is beautiful.

X is for Xavier #AtoZChallenge

Join me on the A to Z Challenge: I'll share a different thing from my new home, Cincinnati, every day for 26 days in April.

I was about to skip over X and go to Y. That's twice this challenge I've done that. Clearly, the alphabet and I are having a critical difference of opinion.

Xavier University is one of many institutes of higher learning in Cincinnati--I tried to nail down an exact number, but apparently no one has bothered to count them. (Okay, actually, everyone has bothered to count them, but can't agree on the number.) Basically, if you want to learn things, you're in good shape here.

I read this guy's label, then promptly forgot who he was,
although reason would suggest he's Frances Xavier.
Anyway, he's at the entrance to vaguely gesture at people
as they arrive.

Xavier is a Catholic university, among the oldest in the country, and while I'm wildly out of the loop re: Midwest universities and how they've been getting on in my 20-year absence from the region, Xavier seems to be not too shabby in either academics or athletics. A handful of my coworkers went there, if all one hears is true, so I can at least vouch for some of Xavier's graduates being awesome.

I don't know what this is, but I kind of expect the Doctor
to turn up and point a sonic screwdriver at it.

Their mascot is D'Artagnan, certainly Chadwick's favourite of the Musketeers, which softens my heart toward Xavier already, even if they didn't have excellent bike parking.

But they do! Very well done, Xavier. So, re: the lack of human
activity... this was one of the stops on Susan's (not me; the other one)
Easter Sunday Tour of Cincinnati, but being as it was Easter
the Catholic school was on holiday. It was kind of creepy
wandering around not seeing any students.

Not sure about the presence of any bike lanes nearby, because I didn't look, but if the rest of the city is any indication it's lucky for Xavier students who travel actively that there are nice wide sidewalks surrounding them.

Like the one next to this sign, for instance.

Bellarmine Chapel on campus has a hyperbolic paraboloid roof (note to self: look up those words), so that even even if the walls were to come a-tumbling down, the roof would stay up, which I would call witchcraft except this is a Catholic university, so I'm thinking the roof has its own patron saint. I admit that would be useful to have.

The thing on the front is cool, too. I wonder if it's ever open to the public?

V is for Vontz #AtoZChallenge

Join me on the A to Z Challenge: I'll share a different thing from my new home, Cincinnati, every day for 26 days in April.

On Easter Sunday my friend Susan willingly participated in a day of "hey, I need to gather some pics for my blog," and we drove past this building that I'd never properly looked at before. All I read of the sign was "molecular studies," so I asked, "Is that building supposed to be shaped like a molecule?"

From what I've read: no. It's just some cool Gehry architecture. 

So, because reading the entire sign is for other people, I said something about how it was too bad I hadn't seen it before my M day, and Susan said, "You can still use it. That's the Vontz building."

Hey, what do you know! It's right there in great big letters.

By the way, Susan and I have this recurring habit of introducing ourselves to visitors at church at the same time, after which I have an unfortunate tendency to say that we don't usually travel as a two-pack of Susans, because I have yet to learn the art of saying hello and then shutting up. Also this:

Anyway, I don't actually know anything about architecture--my appreciation for buildings mostly extends to, "hey, that one is pretty!"--so for further anaylsis you'll need someone else. The Vontz Building is part of the University of Cincinnati, and is across from the UC hospital, so lots of cool and smart things are happening here. The building is already in need of some repair/renovation, despite being less than 20 years old. Bummer.

But seriously, how great is a building that looks like it was built
by one of the Animaniacs?

Outside the building, there's this:

I saw it and thought, "Wait, that Sabin? The polio vaccine guy?"
So, good job, history teachers! I hadn't realised until now that
Cincinnati was Dr. Sabin's home.

And this:

Great plaza space that was being used by approximately zero students,
But since this area is where science students learn things, I presume they're all
studying hard for finals. Or maybe they just don't like going outdoors that much.

I want one of these:

It's a giant leaf. I can't believe no one was sitting on it.

In the department of less-spectacular things found nearby, there's this ridiculous sign right at the intersection where the Vontz building (and the hospital!) is. I certainly don't want to ascribe ill will to the hardworking city planners and traffic engineers of Cincinnati, but who looks at an intersection that will be serving thousands of students and transit-dependent folks and thinks, "Let's not bother with a crosswalk on this side"? I mean, seriously.

Welcome, pedestrians! Please enjoy your walk all the way around
the intersection instead of going in a straight line. We certainly
hope you're able-bodied and not at all in need of the hospital's services.

People cross midblock near this intersection all day long, and who can blame them? I did the same thing coming back because I couldn't be bothered waiting for three light cycles instead of just one. Get it together, Cincinnati.

It's all the more egregious when you consider these things are within
a few feet of the "no pedestrians" sign. Talk about your mixed messages.

Public Performance

The amazing Angela wrote an excellent thing about public grief for celebrities a couple months back, which got us talking a little bit about performative grief and why humans engage in it. I still don't have answers, but sometimes putting fingers on keyboard yields coherent thought. Let's see.

Speaking of performance--why
else would this expression resonate
with so many?

I first learned the expression "performative _____" in an Introduction to Theatre class my final semester at UT. Our instructor spent an early lecture talking about the distinctions between theatre and performance, because all of life is performance. (Think about the choices you make this morning-- showered or not? Shaved or not? What do you wear? How does your hair/makeup look? Do you drive, walk, bike, or take transit to work? And the critical one--what do all those performances say about you?) Calling it a performance doesn't make it any less genuine--I walk to work instead of driving and it's absolutely a statement about what's important to me, but that doesn't change the fact that I get there every day. Ditto for those who drive in and daily complain about the traffic. We still arrive. Transportation was performed, by different people with different lifestyles and preferences.

Social media adds an extra dimension to our performance, and one of the reasons I love it so much is that it gives me the chance to reflect on my own performance as well as those happening around me, share those thoughts with friends, get feedback--my whole life has devolved into one long metadiscourse, and engaging with others' metadiscourses at the same time. You know what? I'm okay with that--if for no other reason that it allows me to know people differently than if I merely saw them at the water cooler a couple times a day. It's still a performance, and a carefully curated one at that, but there's a reason I call many folks I know from Twitter "friends" even if we've only met in real life once or twice. Or never. What's presented face-to-face is no less curated, but it's a different collection of what makes me me than I can share online. Or of what makes you you.

What does this have to do with public grief? As Angela points out, it would be so much cooler to read the stories of how this or that celebrity touched lives. And that's what many folks share, and it's beautiful. And many more of us content ourselves with "RIP _____" or "Enough already!" or something in between. Because, I think, not knowing the deceased personally makes it a bit of a struggle to know how to respond appropriately, but the human brain craves that connection with others, to collectively acknowledge that something has shifted in the world. And, for many, there's a need to be seen engaging with the story of the day. So we post our memes and sad emojis and favourite YouTube clips, and after a couple of days our desire for that connection and/or display is met. And a new performance stands ahead of us, waiting for us to engage.

So is it a good or bad thing? I'm not sure I can say. What do you think?

They Tell Me It's Super

I realised a few days ago that my already sparse knowledge of American football has become even sparser in the last year or so, and I'm pretty sure that's because God loves me and has surrounded me with people who have other interests to talk about. (And believe me, I did my time with the people who can't talk about anything else.)

Football is basically this, right?
But without the singing
and the major character death?

However, I still managed to scrounge up a couple football-related stories this season that I'm not sure I ever shared. The first one happened when Jennie & I got back from our fun-filled weekend seeing Wicked, and we arrived at Billy & Jennie's house in time for Texas (my alma mater) v Notre Dame (who live in my home state).

Me: Are they at home?
Billy: ...
Me: That means something different for you than it does for me, doesn't it?
Billy: Yeah. They're in Austin.
Me: Great, so they're at home.
Billy: No, they're not.

But it gets better, because when he got up to go refill his drink or whatever, I said, "Oh, is it intermission already?" and without even blinking, he said, "Yep." Y'all, I make a lot of fun of my brother, because as his older sister it is my sacred duty, but he really is a treasure. It wasn't until much later that night when I mentioned that I appreciate his ability to translate Su-speak into English that he said, "Oh, you mean like when you called halftime 'intermission'?"

Yes. Exactly like that.

Speaking of people who are treasures. Thanks for
putting it into my language, Tony Awards.
(Some bright spark on Instagram said this is demeaning
and insulting. To be clear: that's only true if you're actively
looking to be demeaned or insulted. Have a laugh, would you please.)

Story #2 happened when my parents were moving my stuff into my Cincinnati storage unit, which happened to be up the street from one of the two professional sports stadiums in town. Dad asked, "Is that the Bengals or the Reds stadium?" I said, "Do either of those two teams play tennis?" He said, "Right. Never mind," and asked a friendly-looking pedestrian instead. (It was Bengals stadium. Sometimes I manage to remember for minutes at a time who the Bengals are.)

Enjoy the game, y'all. I still don't even know who's playing. (Don't tell me. I treasure my ignorance.)

#NaNoWriMo Prep: You Can Do This!

NaNoWriMo is almost here! I can't even remember if November was worth being excited about before I started doing NaNo. This is year #7 for me, my first in a new region (Cincinnati), and I have a fresh idea just waiting for me to do something terrible to it. In the meantime, here's my collected tips for getting the most out of your November.

Rule #1: You can do this. You can.
Whatever your life circumstance--full-time job, kids at home, triple major undergrad, high school student--lots of people just like you have done NaNoWriMo successfully before. That doesn't mean you won't face challenges, or even that NaNo is definitely the right thing for you to do this year. But if you want to NaNo, don't write yourself off without first considering strategies for facing your challenges head-on. (More specific advice for students below.)

Rule #2: If your social media accounts aren't helping you, they're off-limits.
Unless you have a supportive community who gets what NaNo is all about and shares inspiration instead of filling your timeline with whatever nonsense is in season, you don't have time to fritter away on social media. For me, it's best to keep Twitter and turn off everything else. Blogging may fall into this category, depending on if it helps you or not. Make your choices early and stick to your guns!

Rule #3: Commuting time is writing time.
Carpool or take the bus. It's valuable writing time. Bonus: you'll save gas and create less pollution. Plus, you can transcribe bizarre conversations directly into your novel. It's a win-win-win-win. Change the names of your carpool buddies in your novel before you get it published, though.

Rule #4: Minutes matter!
Sitting in the pickup/dropoff line? Five minutes between classes? Waiting for a work meeting to start? Have a little Word War with yourself and see how many words you can get in those few minutes. If you've never been able to write in short spurts before, NaNoWriMo is a great time to flex those dormant writing muscles and see what they can do for you. To make this work best, be sure you're syncing your novel across all your devices.

Rule #5 (for students only): Do your homework first.
Even better: you still have a whole bunch of October left to get ahead in as many classes as possible. But once November hits, you still should finish classwork before NaNo-ing. You're spending too much time, money, and effort on your education to slack off just because it's NaNoWriMo. Think of writing time as your reward.

Rule #6: Convenience foods are okay.
Obviously, you don't want to hit the drive-thru every day or you'll be both rounder and poorer once NaNo is over. But having some freezer meals, microwaveable foods, and ready-to-eat fruit and veg on hand will make your life a touch easier, especially if your kids can handle preparing those things on their own.

And most importantly...
Rule #7: You must always be doing something.
This one is also more geared for students, especially if you're early in your educational career and your time management skills aren't quite there yet. NaNo is a great time to give those a kick-start. The critical thing to remember in November is this: if you're awake, you're doing something. Keep your novel and any reading for class handy so you can grab one or the other when you have a couple free minutes. Make to-do lists so you don't forget things. Take time for your relationships, don't neglect your self-care, keep up with your life stuff so you don't get fired--but whatever you do, keep moving.

Don't be intimidated! NaNoWriMo is lots of fun and has launched bunches of great ideas for thousands of writers around the world, so don't be afraid to jump in. And while you're at it, let's be buddies.

The Educational Bus

Since I'm sitting here in no-public-transportation land (a dismal place to be, y'all), I'll indulge in some nostalgia and fond shouting out to one form of transportation I didn't use a lot in Austin: the UT shuttle system.

In the last couple years, CapMetro has made some changes to the shuttle system, notably cancelling one low-performing route and beginning to upgrade their fleet to buses that carry fareboxes, as well as having the same look and branding of the rest of the bus system fleet. Up until recently, the shuttles had all-door boarding and no payment was required (technically, non-students were supposed to pay, but that's hard to do when there's no farebox). Now, students have to swipe their student IDs and the general public has to pay to ride, just like on every other bus. While I'm sure this cuts down on lost fares, it also slows down boarding. Time will tell if that's a good trade-off.

The orange-and-white UT buses are on their way out.
Source: UT Parking & Transportation page.

Anyway, on to singing praises. Generally speaking, the shuttles are good for two things: 1) Going to campus, and 2) Going from campus to another place served by the shuttle service. Plus it's a limited-stop service, so while it's always crowded, it is also usually faster than the comparable local bus service.

A few months ago, I had to go across town in the morning, changing buses downtown, for a total trip time that was somewhere between "I could be halfway to Dallas by now" and "Are you freaking kidding me?" Then I remembered the UT shuttles. I rode one to campus, changed buses, then had a bus all to myself (since I was going opposite the direction students were going) for the second half of the trip. All in less than half the time door-to-door than a regular local bus would have taken.

I'm not necessarily encouraging that the people of Austin go out and invade the student shuttles in droves--although perhaps if they did, CapMetro would have a bit more incentive to make the regular buses as frequent and convenient as the shuttles. And that would be an even better thing that a few specifically useful routes: for every route in the CapMetro system to be as useful, frequent, and easy to ride as the UT shuttles.

Now, if my hometown would just get on board with the public transportation thing.

Mission: Collaborate

One of my goals for 2016 is to do some writing outside my normal genres, just to mix it up and stretch those muscles a bit. So for the last few weeks, I chipped away slowly at a thing I would never have come up with on my own.

I don't want to give too much away, since it's not even my story, so let's start at the very beginning: about six months ago, recurring Cheeky guest blogger Bill sent me a prompt for a collaborative story he's working on, which I stuck in a file and immediately forgot about. About two months ago, he circled back and asked if I had written anything yet. Ooops!

Not here.

So I did. It's sci-fi, set not on Earth, and is the kind of story I love to read and watch but have never written myself, so I was a bit scared and a lot stymied about how to begin. As so often happens, an idea arrived while I was out running. (I mean, what else do I have to think about for four miles?) I started writing with that idea in mind, managed a half dozen pages, and sent it back last week in the hopes that it jibes at least a little bit with the rest of the project.

I'm totally flattered that anyone would voluntarily ask me to collaborate on a writing project. Bill & I first met when we were in the same Creative Writing class at UT (I used to crash into him with my backpack a lot-- I'm not that great at spatial awareness) and we've been friends ever since, so for someone to have read as much of my writing as he has and still want to read more of it is super-friendly.

So! One goal, well underway, with a little help from my friends. I may write some more sci-fi/fantasy just for fun and to continue to work writing muscles that haven't seen a lot of action.

What have you done to stretch lately?

Carrying Capacity

While I was in college, I tended to use my bicycle as a mobile library. This was pretty rough on my panniers, since I ignored the suggested weight limits and just packed stuff in as long as there was space. As a result, I tore through two sets in four years.

Rather than get a new set right away when the second one came apart (mid-ride, alas--that was quite a day), I pulled out an old crate that I've had since I was about 15. My tastes in colour schemes have changed just a bit in the intervening years:

Yep, I'm dressed as Elphaba. It was Halloween.
I was not dressed as Fiona, despite many people who guessed her first. Eeep.

But in recent weeks, the crate has started cracking a bit and the bungees were getting frayed, so it was time for a new solution, especially since I don't carry massive grad school books everywhere I go any longer.

I was looking for something that was easy to get on and off, preferably carry-able. I settled on this one (a pair of this one, that is) from Green Guru that's made of recycled banners, which is a nice bonus here in Su-Land.

And as another nice bonus: they fold flat against the bike when not in use, so I can leave them on the bus, even the three-slot racks where the bikes are super close together.

What's also great about these, as opposed to the crate, is that having the crate was affecting the way I was sitting, which changed how my muscles and everything else operated. No prizes for guessing how bad of an idea that is if you don't want worn-out quads. There's nothing wrong with using a crate and bungees, of course, but I do recommend that anyone going down that road take a bit more time than I did to consider its effect on your body and adjust as necessary.

Being able to carry things is a big part to being a transportation cyclist. It's easy enough to just wear a backpack, but putting it on the bike makes the trip a lot more pleasant, and having something that properly hooks onto the bike will work a lot better than trying to hold things or hang bags off the handlebars (please don't do that!) while riding. The best solution, as ever, is the one that works best for you. Just keep in mind that the weight limits on panniers are a thing.

Pep Up Your #NaNoWriMo

There's a NaNoWriMo badge this year for writing a NaNo Pep Talk, which you're technically supposed to post in the forums, but I have a blog, so here it is.

This will be my sixth NaNoWriMo, and my first one not being juggled along with end-of-semester chaos, for which I am incredibly thankful. But every year in the forums, there's a thread with some variation on, "OMG, I'm doing NaNo while in college! How will I survive??" Obviously, thousands of people manage it every year, so it can be done. But it's easier with a few tips:

1. If your social media accounts aren't helping you, they're off-limits.
Unless you have a supportive community who gets what NaNo is all about and shares inspiration instead of filling your timeline with whatever nonsense is in season, you don't have time to fritter away on social media. For me, it's best to keep Twitter, turn off everything else. Blogging may fall into this category, depending on if it helps you or not. Make your choices early and stick to your guns!

2. Commuting time is writing time.
If public transportation is an option in your city, now is the time to use it. If not, consider carpooling with a friend. Time not spent driving is time you can spend writing! And to make this one work even better...

3. Make sure your NaNo novel syncs across all your devices.
Google docs, Dropbox, email it to yourself-- whatever it takes to be sure if you have to switch from laptop to tablet to phone that your novel comes with you. Obviously, if you're using the Luddite Clause, this one doesn't apply to you.

4. Minutes matter!
Only have five minutes to write between classes? No worries. Have a little Word War with yourself and see how many words you can get in those five minutes. If you've never been able to write in short spurts before, NaNoWriMo is a great time to flex those dormant writing muscles and see what they can do for you.

5. Do your homework first.
Even better: you still have a whole bunch of October left to get ahead in as many classes as possible. But once November hits, you still should finish classwork before NaNo-ing. You're spending too much time, money, and effort on your education to slack off just because it's NaNoWriMo. Think of writing time as your reward.

6. Caffeine is your friend.
Especially if you can make your own caffeinated beverages at home and save some cash. Get yourself a good travel mug ahead of November so you can keep your caffeine on hand.

And the most important one to remember:

7. You must always be doing something.
If you don't already have good time management skills, no worries. The critical thing to remember in November is this: if you're awake, you're doing something. Keep your novel and any reading for class handy so you can grab one or the other when you have a couple free minutes. Make to-do lists so you don't forget things. Take time to eat, look after yourself, do your share of the housework so your roommate doesn't kill you-- but whatever you do, keep moving.

Yes, doing NaNoWriMo and higher education at the same time is possible, even though it may seem daunting. Don't give up!

Library Love

Image from Goodreads.

I just finished reading This Book is Overdue: How Librarians and Cybrarians can Save Us All, by Marilyn Johnson. And it's fantastic. Biggest takeaway: Learn more about the Connecticut Four, who are the subject of Chapter Five of this book. They fought back when the FBI demanded information about who'd been using the library computers. Learn about them-- this is the kind of thing we need to know.

If you read the Goodreads reviews, you'll see the responses are mixed. The points about the book being disjointed and not having a clear idea of what it's about are fair enough. Especially interesting, IMO, are the reviews from librarians, since this book is about their field.

However! I loved it, in no small part because libraries have kept me reading my entire life. I just dashed off a Goodreads review of Full House, a book I read as a freshman in high school that was solidly among my list of books to never, ever take home, because my parents would have freaked out. Our fantastic little library in my hometown kept me sane as a teen, allowing me to escape from the weird that is high school and my parents' insistence on keeping the TV running all the time. (Sidebar: when my family raced to my side after Chadwick passed away, they went something like 36 hours without the TV on because we just don't watch it that much, until my father finally couldn't take it any longer and turned it on. And that's what happens to people who don't spend enough time in a library.)

As much as I would love to own many of the books that I read, as much as I want to support authors, my book buying budget is sadly limited to buying just a handful of books a year, and in recent years that budget has been entirely spent on textbooks. So I use the library as my second bookshelf, so to speak, until such time as I'm independently wealthy and can build my own library with a small bedroom and kitchen attached.

Do you use your local library? What's your favorite thing about it? If you don't use the library-- why not?

In More Ways Than One

This is the graphic I usually use when
I write about being a non-trad. I've
used it for so long I can't remember
where I got it.

Many, many times in the course of the last five years, I've talked about the fun involved in being a non-traditional student. That mostly went away when I started grad school, since going to grad school in your mid-30s is not that unusual, but it's not like I've forgotten that a good chunk of my friends and acquaintances in Austin are 12-15 years younger than I. (I've tried to forget. I don't actually like thinking about the differences between us. But the differences come up sometimes.)

So it's been on my mind the past couple of months that not only did I do college weird, but I also made it weird for others. I don't know why I didn't think about this before now. I probably should have figured it out, given the number of questions about long-term relationships that I used to field on a daily basis, or the time one of my classmates said during a TV-centered conversation, "You watch Friends? But that's our parents' show!" and I had to lie down.

But obviously Peak Weird (God, please let this be the peak!) for my college friends was reached a couple of months ago, when the post-college whirl of engagements and weddings was interrupted by the news that one of their classmates had lost a spouse. When so many of my young friends are still undecided about whether a long-term commitment to one person is even something they're interested in, this happens.

And I would be remiss if I didn't give my UT friends all the credit and kudos in the world, because the outpouring of support and kindness I've received from them is just as real and heartfelt and thoughtful and appreciated as it has been from every other group of friends I've managed to collect. Some of them came to the funeral. Some sent cards. One of them took the time to find just the right poem that she thought would lift my spirits (it did). All of them have sent text messages or Facebook messages or phone calls that have brightened my day and reminded me of just how blessed I have been in this chapter of my life, the chapter called "college," the one I'm finally leaving behind after this weekend.

But the point is, you're not supposed to be summoned to a classmate's spouse's funeral a couple years after graduating college. That's just not the way it's meant to be... and yet it happens. And while I would rather have not been non-traditional in this particular sense, had I been given the choice, I don't think I'd trade all the other senses of the word for anything.

In My Mailbox: Something I'm In Edition

So, this arrived today:

Want a copy of this book? It's really quite good as a reference,
even without my essay in it. Get it on Amazon here. And if you
want to shop Amazon Smile supporting the Texas Bicycle Coalition,
that'd be okay, too. 

It's a college textbook. To be more specific, it's the latest edition of a textbook that was required for a class I took at my final semester at UT, and the major difference between this edition and the edition I was supposed to buy in the spring of 2012 (totally didn't buy it. I borrowed a classmate's all semester long) is this: I HAVE AN ESSAY IN THIS BOOK.

Yep, after the assignment that's in here, my instructor (John J. Ruszkiewicz, the first name on the cover there) said he thought my essay was better than the one that was in that edition of the textbook and asked if he could use mine in the next edition. I managed not to shriek, "YES! ARE YOU KIDDING? OF COURSE!" when I agreed. I just didn't expect the next edition to come out this fast.

I admit I did wait until used copies appeared on Amazon before I bought a copy, because textbooks are freakishly expensive (sorry, Dr. Ruszkiewicz). And after my initial shrieking and jumping up and down and posting on Facebook that I did earlier, I took a closer look at the index & saw that some of my classmates are also in this edition, which of course makes me all kinds of happy. I already read one of their essays and will eventually make my way through the others.

If you want to read the essay without buying the book, you can read it on Google books here (click on the top result). It's about women running marathons. I know, I know, big surprise.

Parlez-vous français? (Not so much.)

I was having fond reminiscences earlier about my French class, which was two years ago now. In so many ways, that was the worst class ever-- I think I ended with a C- (I took it pass/fail, so I don't really know), it took up so much of my time when I was trying to survive a difficult linguistics class, not embarrass myself in creative writing, and apply to grad school, all at the same time. And I don't even want to talk about what NaNoWriMo was like that year (although it was the time of the infamous "it's like being on drugs" quote-- come to think of it, some drugs might have helped) (just kidding: Please don't do drugs just because I said it would help).

Even through all that, it was my favourite of my four semesters at UT. Mostly, it was because of my creative writing class, which I loved. LOVED. Our instructor was amazing, and most of the class genuinely liked one another (or if they didn't, they were all very good actors!). And it was full of crazy-good writers. I spent the entire semester feeling inferior, but not really, because my classmates wouldn't let me feel that way for long. I thought more than one of my classmates from creative writing had guest blogged for me here before, but no, just one of them has. But even without them being willing to hang out around Cheekyness, they were still a great group. Incidentally, the class was entirely juniors and seniors, so I got to see about half of them graduate this past spring when I went to the English department graduation. Such a treat to recognise so many names.

This is French enough, right? To my great regret, we never
watched Phantom or Les Misérables in French.

Where was I? Right, French. The other big contributor to my loving that semester so much was French. Why? Because it was a challenge that I just couldn't overcome. I spent the entire semester frantically treading French water, trying to keep my head up enough to take a breath every now and then. I was hopelessly bad at it, the more so because I wasn't trying that hard due to the whole pass/fail thing and having five other classes that I did want to make good grades in. However, French Teacher is 1) Really good at teaching; 2) An all-around nice guy; and 3) The same age as me. The first two made me want to work harder in the class, because I felt bad for wasting his time and also because he's already perfected the art of gentle suggestion-- he'd mention in passing that I maybe should spent a little bit more time with vocabulary, and 20 minutes later I'd be in the library slaving over a list of French words. (Okay, it helps that I'm quite impressionable.)

The third bit, us being the same age, was just a help in making the class more enjoyable. There were a couple other non-trads in the room, but for some reason French Teacher and I were the ones pulling out all the same pop culture references and agreeing on all the cool hangout spots in town. For example, one day he asked (by way of talking about how accents affect your understanding), "How many of you have seen Trainspotting?" I raised my hand, but no one else did. He looked at me, grinned, said, "Okay, generation gap," and moved on. Repeat once a week for the entire semester, and you can see how the two of us struck up a friendship before the semester was out.

For all that the class nearly killed me, it was totally worth it and I can look back on it in fondness for this reason: It was hard. It was a struggle. For once in my life, I ran into something that brought me to tears of frustration on a regular basis and yet I stuck to it, gaining as my reward the very thing I was after: I know the basis of French pronunciation and grammar so I can at least have a stab at French words now. And as a bonus, I also learned about prioritization and that it's okay not to be able to do everything, two little nuggets of knowledge that are coming in handy in grad school.

TL;DR: Wow, that was long. Guess I needed to empty my brain. When was a time in your life that you felt like you were struggling for no purpose? (Bet everybody else's are a bit more substantial than French class.) What did you learn? What would you do differently if you had that time to do over again?

What Do You Do?

A few weeks ago, a friend who I see a lot on social media but haven't seen in person for many years asked, "So what is it you do? I've just realised I don't know."

Saw this on Google+. Joked that I need to do
this, with Google+, Pinterest, Flickr, LinkedIn,
and Reddit on the other hand.

I was a bit horrified.

In case you don't know, I do the social media and communications for BikeTexas, the statewide bicycle and pedestrian advocacy group. While I don't make a big deal out of this on my personal social media pages, I do mention it from time to time (as most people do with their jobs), and until that moment I had considered myself to be an above average social media user. But a friend who knows me in real life? Had no idea I was a social media manager? It's moments like that that tell me it's time to step up my game.

So, up I stepped. I've filled my Feedly with social media news. I joined Google+ and LinkedIn groups. I started reading all the articles I can get my hands on about best practises. I still think I'm an above average social media user, but now I have the additional fun of being a bit of a snob when I see other brands making mistakes that a few milliseconds of Google searching will tell you not to make.

So what? Well, this is why I haven't been blogging. My summer off from grad school turned into a summer of learning how to be a great social media manager, or at least a shade-above-mediocre one. But I have missed spilling my thoughts on here. Good news-- classes start back next week! I'll have a lot more to talk about and a lot less time to write it down, if the last two semesters are anything to go by.

Are we connected? If not, why not? I'm on Twitter, Google+, LinkedIn, and Pinterest! (My Facebook is still private. I'm more fun on those other networks, anyway.) Let's be friends!

Has someone ever made an innocent comment to you that turned into a call to action?

Z is for Zzzz

When I was first old enough to have friends in college-- at about age 14-- I used to marvel at how much they could sleep when they came home. It was like they transformed from normal humans into bizarrely somnambulant beings when they made that leap to college. I didn't even know what to think about that.

If I'm studying like this,
I'm guaranteed to be asleep
in less than 5 minutes.
I've had to change to a
standing desk. From
hvaldez1 on stock.xchng.

Now that I've done college in three different spurts, I do understand: College involves a fair amount of work, late night is a good time to get things done, and some of this sleepiness is self-inflicted from spending time on non-school things and putting in some heavy-duty procrastination. Even the best of students still falls victim to procrastinating, even the hardest workers who also have jobs and are not entirely in control of their schedule-- it happens. And to some extent, why shouldn't it? We've set up our university system so that those who wish can take a heavy courseload, lock themselves in their rooms, and graduate early, while the less-in-a-hurry among us can make some friends and have some fun along the way. And the ones who only want to have fun end up crashing out and having to take a serious look at their life path, which can be a good thing.

Grad school is more of the same x100 (at least in the beginning; it gets more intense as you go on, I've heard), which means there's less time for partying and that procrastination is for those with a death wish. And yet, here I am at the end of the A to Z Challenge, having gotten by with some help from my friends, and still slogging through the stack of work that's due this week. My plan for this weekend is to turn 35 gracefully and then sleep for three days.

On the upside, I'm rarely bored.

Did you survive A to Z? Are you ready for all the blogs you read to return to regular programming? Could you pass me the tea, please, because I'm now mainlining caffeine?

Guest Post: Y is for Youthful

Today's guest post fits oh-so-beautifully into the grad school theme, for all that it was written by my undergraduate cousin. Amanda is a returning guest blogger, and is occasionally known as "Baby Cousin" here at Cheekyness (yes, even though she's nearly-22 and quite a bit taller than I!).

A few weeks ago, I went to Build-A-Bear with my friend Hermes. He saw that BAB was offering new “ponies” from My Little Pony, and he just HAD to go and build one (Yes, he’s a bronie). Thus, he invited me along, and we departed on a trip to the mall. This mall was close to Indianapolis, and once we made it, it. Was. Awesome. I’d never built my own bear before, and it was so fun picking out a bear and clothing, and just hanging with Hermes.

So, Indianapolis. I don’t get to regularly venture out of Greenfield or Muncie, where I go to school. Indy is more reserved for trips to the zoo, or Gen Con. But on the way there, we saw a billboard for this indoor trampoline park! They have dodge ball competitions, or you pay by the hour to just jump with friends or goof off. Hermes says we HAVE to do it, and I agree. Then we start talking about stuff in general that we’ve never done before. Hermes mentions that he’s never gone to the casino, despite turning 21 last month.

From Su: This family is all about
the musicals. Okay, so only about
half of us are. Whatever. Source.

This gets me thinking—I have a car, and as a student, I’m not rich, but I do have some “play money,” as my mom calls it; enough money to go out to eat with my boyfriend a few times a month, or to do whatever with. And it hits me—I haven’t really made any plans to go and DO anything recently. Maybe a big part of it is school taking over my life, but I need to take a step back and be YOUTHFUL! And not just 2am trips to Steak n Shake; but take pictures, and go out and do things with friends.

The next week, Hermes and I made plans to go to the casino, and hopefully at the end of the week, I’ll make a trip up to Chicago’s Broadway with my boyfriend to see Big Fish the Musical. And a trip to the indoor trampoline park is in the works. My lesson in this blog post? Be youthful. Go and do something in your city you’ve never done before.

It might just be awesome.

Guest Post: V is for Valour

Today's post is by returning guest blogger Paula.

Val-or: Noun: Boldness or determination in facing great danger, especially in battle; heroic courage; bravery. Origin: 1350-1400 Middle England

Hello! My name is Paula and I am back to guest blog for Su! I chose this letter for multiple reasons, but the first one is this: I am currently OBSESSED with the BBC America show Merlin. Though the show no longer runs, the lessons that I have learned from the two seasons I have watched so far are really helping me get through college. The last few days of school are coming my way and I am getting really anxious. The amounts of assignments I have coming up are alarming, but there is one thing I can keep in mind: Valour means to go bold or go home, if you want to put it into modern terms. And that was exactly what I am going to do. And that is what I think you should do, too. I have no idea what is going on in your life, but I know that, if you are going through a tough time, thinking like a Knight of Camelot might just get you somewhere.

From cakeykate on stock.xchng.

Now, you might not be facing a fire-breathing dragon or a high-powered Warlock, but you might have to face another long day at work or school. You might have to pay those bills you’re struggling to pay or you might just have to face that in-law. Whatever your battle is, take it in strides and think like a Knight. I can almost guarantee you that those knights were not the bravest when they looked their competition straight in the eye, but they had an honour to withhold, and they were going to do just that. You might not have an honour to withhold, but you do have something to prove to yourself. You can do it, you will make it, and that person may be there tomorrow but it doesn’t mean you have to listen to EVERYTHING they say. (Unless that person is your boss, and if that’s the case, well…carry on.) The Knights of Camelot were noble men, but what doesn’t make you noble, the fact that you don’t wear a symbol on your chest? You can be completely noble to yourself every single day; all you have to do is take a deep breath and go.

I have to take my own advice here, which is why I am sharing this with you, but I wanted to let you know that you can make it, too. No matter what your “dragon” is, you get to face it with an Excalibur of your own. Personally, my Excalibur is going to be my books and my mind and my (awful) time management. What is your Excalibur? Who are your fellow Knights? Are you more of a Lancelot or a Percival? Either way, remember, you’re doing this task; you’re facing this “dragon” with valour and dignity, pride and accomplishment. You’ve already been knighted, now all you have to do is face the dragon.

Good luck, my fellow Knights.
~Paula ☺

T is for TA

Being a TA is a normal part of most graduate programes, en route to teaching lower-level classes in the final years of the PhD.

I don't think they use these any more.
From ywel on stock.xchng.

I am not normal.

No,  I'm an online student, and while I've heard there are online programs that include TA-ing for lower-level classes, my program doesn't do that. So on the one hand, I've been spared the quirks and silliness of a classroom full of freshman. On the other hand, I've also missed out on this valuable opportunity to see what college looks like from the other side of the podium. There are trade-offs to everything.

Most of my TAs at UT were spectacular, and I enjoyed getting to know them. (Although I have noticed that MA students tend to stand on their dignity a bit more than PhD students do-- I hope I'm not one of that type!) The only TA I really had a problem with was Skinny Jeans, who I managed to mention a few times. However, knowing that some of my TAs were wonderful and others not makes me even sorrier that I'm not getting a chance to learn how to do it well instead of muddling through badly, as I'm sure the first couple of semesters would go.

Since I know many of my readers are teachers at some level, today's question is: What was the most challenging part of your early teaching days? Do you even remember the things that used to be a challenge?