They Tell Me It's Super

I realised a few days ago that my already sparse knowledge of American football has become even sparser in the last year or so, and I'm pretty sure that's because God loves me and has surrounded me with people who have other interests to talk about. (And believe me, I did my time with the people who can't talk about anything else.)

Football is basically this, right?
But without the singing
and the major character death?

However, I still managed to scrounge up a couple football-related stories this season that I'm not sure I ever shared. The first one happened when Jennie & I got back from our fun-filled weekend seeing Wicked, and we arrived at Billy & Jennie's house in time for Texas (my alma mater) v Notre Dame (who live in my home state).

Me: Are they at home?
Billy: ...
Me: That means something different for you than it does for me, doesn't it?
Billy: Yeah. They're in Austin.
Me: Great, so they're at home.
Billy: No, they're not.

But it gets better, because when he got up to go refill his drink or whatever, I said, "Oh, is it intermission already?" and without even blinking, he said, "Yep." Y'all, I make a lot of fun of my brother, because as his older sister it is my sacred duty, but he really is a treasure. It wasn't until much later that night when I mentioned that I appreciate his ability to translate Su-speak into English that he said, "Oh, you mean like when you called halftime 'intermission'?"

Yes. Exactly like that.

Speaking of people who are treasures. Thanks for
putting it into my language, Tony Awards.
(Some bright spark on Instagram said this is demeaning
and insulting. To be clear: that's only true if you're actively
looking to be demeaned or insulted. Have a laugh, would you please.)

Story #2 happened when my parents were moving my stuff into my Cincinnati storage unit, which happened to be up the street from one of the two professional sports stadiums in town. Dad asked, "Is that the Bengals or the Reds stadium?" I said, "Do either of those two teams play tennis?" He said, "Right. Never mind," and asked a friendly-looking pedestrian instead. (It was Bengals stadium. Sometimes I manage to remember for minutes at a time who the Bengals are.)

Enjoy the game, y'all. I still don't even know who's playing. (Don't tell me. I treasure my ignorance.)