So I've had a week of emotional upheaval.
Said upheaval has been mixed with the normal wackiness that comes from being me, which has brought me a whole new dimension of crazy. I don't even know what to call it.
I thought maybe the crazy was because Chad was gone this week. It could be from over-exposure to Lord of the Rings (I read the books and watched the movies all in the same 10-day period). Perhaps it is due to the inner hype I've been building for the past 6 months in anticipation of the Olympics. (Yeah. I'm that much of a fan.) Or the stress at work. Or an unanticipated reaction to the anniversary of losing Grandpa.
We've wondered in the past, due to my sizable mood swings and seasons of insomnia (yep, I'm having one of those, too), if I might be manic-depressive. Chad brought the question up again in the midst of the Opening Ceremonies Friday night, when in the stretch of those four hours I went from out-and-out crying (at the pictures of parents weeping for their children after the earthquake) to absolute delight at the show being played out, back to teary at the Chinese children singing, then over to all but jumping up and down when Scotland the Brave came on, followed by squeals of joy at seeing Rafael Nadal and Roger Federer come in with their respective countries-- and then I went to bed, to lie awake for an hour or two, since I had a brain overactive with what I had seen and anticipation of my race Saturday morning.
Not that it got much better on Saturday-- I got home from my race and finished reading The War of the Ring during beach volleyball (my least favourite Olympic sport, and we're inundated with it) and I couldn't stop crying. Just couldn't. I've read that book at least a half-a-dozen times before, and never once have I been moved to tears. Then there was the fencing medal ceremony-- good grief, you'd think my dog had died.
So I've decided to embrace the emotional crazy and just go with it. I don't seem to have much of an option otherwise. :) Oh, and in the same vein, I also embraced the Olympic OCD and have polished my fingernails to match the Olympic flag. Go Team USA!!
2 comments:
Hehehe, well, I can be pretty emotional myself, although I have to admit, I think you outdo, at least for now. Who knows, it could just be like you said--the combination of all those things hitting you right now. Emotions can be funny things.
I am sorry about your granddad, though. I don't think I was online a lot around the time that you originally wrote about him (or just couldn't think of what to say); I know that's probably going to be on-and-off rough for a long time. Something as big as a someone close moving on is probably going to take some time to adjust to, I'm sure.
Well, this is long and possibly superfluous, but I wanted you to know I'm reading this and thinking of you.
(I am so not into the Olympics, but if they made sports/disorder categories a la OCD, I just might start paying attention ;))
Awww, thanks.
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