What are we talking about today?

I'll get back to theme days once I find a groove of posting regularly. In the meantime, most of my posts are about some variation of books, bikes, buses, or Broadway. Plus bits about writing, nonprofits, and grief from time to time.

This blog is mostly lighthearted and pretty silly. It's not about the terrible things happening in the world, but please know that I'm not ignoring those things. I just generally don't write about them here.

20 February 2012

(I Get) Spam a Lot

Some more spam comments. My additions are in red:


Try some of these to help with your
writing skills.
Hi there mates! Simply want to request for your advise. I will be seriously busy along with work having a occupation and attending tennis lessons. I want to rely on someone else to try and do my homework for me in order to grab the load off my shoulders. Is it considered cheating? Would I get in trouble with the instructors? Exactly what do you advise me personally to do? 
1. Buy a dictionary. 2. Start practicing time management. 3. Don't cheat unless you're willing for your college career to end badly. 4. Use fewer adverbs.


If you can tell me what this one is even about, you're doing better than I am:
Canucks jerseys All of our motherland thinks about the problem, accomplish Vancouver Canucks Jerseys not really assume you want to point out, it is several things. Postscript: After right now, The states Association regarding Chinese language Students as well as Historians from the Higher education, the actual International Ministry to reply to the video call with the effort along granted towards the motherland to help put back this everyday life plus residence labels gain: I've once again for you to personally appeal to your motherland and the single mother's lifestyle and also wellbeing protection, we're also in the catastrophe location, in Canucks Shop making sure their own safety, hang or even end the domestic sort. DAY28 battleground hundred years queen Lord connected with Struggle compilation of dismal targets pink the top of the cash 

Okay, I speak fluent English and read basic French, and I have to say this reads like no Canadian dialect that I've ever heard. My best guess is that we're to buy Canucks jerseys to help single mothers speak Chinese?


And finally, one that comes up so often that I starting to think I should learn Russian (please, Russian-speaking friends, don't read this):
Всем привет! Хочу поделиться с вами ссылкой на ресурс на котором я провожу большую часть свободного времени за компьютером! Многие из нас будь то женщины или мужчины, любят отвлечься от повседневной суеты и отдохнуть от своих забот! Месяц назад я тоже решил отвлечься от тоски и решил поискать, я конечно долго натыкался на смс разводы и прочую нечисть, но через пару часов я нашёл ресурс на котором нет рекламы и даже не нужно регистрироваться что бы посмотреть порно видео. Вот ссылочка на мой любимый сайт, смотрите порно и наслаждайтесь отсутствием рекламы


I think this one may be coming from the same spambots that have been infesting Twitter this week (based on the urls that I deleted). Seriously, for your own sanity, don't try to Google translate this one. I'm sure it's not pretty.


So, there you have it! Any interesting spam in your neighbourhood lately? If you'll excuse me, I'm off to buy a Canucks jersey, since it seems to be so important.

12 comments:

erica and christy said...

You're making me feel good about my spam filters. :)

Those poor Canadian-Chinese-jerseyless mothers. Whatever shall they do now that their emails are being censored?
erica

Su said...

Oh, yes, I should add for the sake of the skeptics: I found all these in my spam filter. Nary a one of them got through.

I just want to know how one pinks the top of the cash. With a marker, perhaps?

Anonymous said...

I don't want to jinx myself but I have never gotten any spam.

Su said...

That's because your stuff is so brilliant, even the spammers are in awe! Me, on the other hand...

Anonymous said...

I'm getting 5 or 6 of these a day now. Wordpress handles them. Just another house cleaning chore to clean them out.

Su said...

Yep, usually a quick "delete all" does it! Although I do like to read them, just for laughs. Or confusion, in this case.

Karen M. Peterson said...

I usually delete my spam comments as quickly as they come in, but I think I'm going to have to give them a closer read. This was fun!

ETowns said...

Hi! Just stopping by to say Hello! I am in the same group as you in the Building Platforms Campaign! Looking forward to writing with you.

Su said...

@Karen: I had another laugh this morning before I deleted them all!

@Elizabeth: Hello! Nice to be campaigning with you!

Linda Fischer said...

I've actually saved two of my spam contents because they make me smile!

Unknown said...

HAHAHAHAAA! Love the first one and your response to it!

Su said...

@Linda: Some of them are brilliant, aren't they? Just not in the way that the spammer intended...

@Rachel: Thanks! That one cracked me up. I especially like "grab the load off my shoulders". It's a nice re-tooling of an old clichè.