What are we talking about today?

Some days have themes. I don't necessarily post something in each of these topic areas every week.

Sunday: Church-related or spiritual things.
Monday: Running.
Tuesday: Books.
Wednesday: Transportation.
Friday: Green living.

06 June 2011

You Might Be A Runner If...

So, these do go around (great job, Jeff Foxworthy!). I've collected a few of my favourites here.

1. If you use the words "easy" and "six miles" in the same sentence... you might be a runner.

2. If you've ever grabbed Body Glide instead of deodorant and decided it was no big deal... you might be a runner.

3. If you've done the opposite and totally freaked out... you might be a runner.

4. If you think a shower without a run preceding it is a waste of time... you might be a runner.

5. If you've ever lost a toenail and then shown your foot to people with pride... you might be a runner.

6. If you are comfortable discussing bowel movements with complete strangers... you might be a runner.

7. If you can convert kilometers to miles and back again in your head... you might be a runner.

8. If you know what PR, PB, PPM, BQ, AG, and GU are, but are a bit fuzzy on all other abbreviations... you might be a runner.

9. If you've ever ingested Vaseline by mistake, thinking it was Gu... you might be a runner with an eyesight problem.

10. If you have ever spent 30 minutes discussing shoes with your friends, and you're a man... you might be a runner.

11. If you know where every public restroom is in a 5-mile radius from your house... you might be a runner.

12. If you're an adult woman and you've peed on the side of the road... you might be a runner.

13. If your medicine cabinet is stocked with baby aspirin, ibuprofen, and Ben-Gay and you aren't a senior citizen... you might be a runner.

14. If you have a speech of reprimand prepared for anyone who asks, "How long is this marathon?"... you might be a runner.

15. If you know the exact mileage on your shoes, but not your car... you might be a runner.

16. If you think Gatorade and GU are food groups... you might be a runner.

17. If you can eat your entire weight in pasta... you might be a runner.

18. If you judge the quality of a race based on how many days you were limping afterwards... you might be a runner.

19. If you send a picture of your new jogging stroller to family and friends to announce your pregnancy... you might be a runner.

20. If you've been smiling and nodding at these... you are DEFINITELY a runner!!

So, what did I miss?


Anonymous said...

I know where ALL the bathrooms are and I am definitely NOT a runner (except when I'm in a hurry for one of those bathrooms).

Susanna Leonard Hill said...

I am not enough of a runner to have DONE all these things, but I'm enough of a runner to recognize how perfect this humor is! Well done!

erica and christy said...

I have no idea what language this post was written in. I'll have to call Christy (who is a runner)!

erica and christy said...

erica just passed word of this post along to me! i nodded and giggled quite a bit! (i don't have a jogging stroller, but maybe i'll get one for my third...due in december! shhh! i haven't announced it yet!) now i'm going to copy and paste your link for this post in an email to my running friends! :0) and again, your comment on our blog cracked me up! christy

Mrs. Harvey said...

This was great! Might need to print this on a t-shirt...

Su said...

@mybabyjohn: LOL!

@Susanna: I've never confused Body Glide & deodorant, nor Vaseline & Gu, and I don't have a jogging stroller. Otherwise, I think I've hit all of them.

@erica: I've worked hard for the past few years to learn this language. ;)

@christy: Yay, jogging strollers! You're going to be one of those ├╝ber-fit women who blow past me at races. ;) And thanks for sharing the link!

@Mrs. Harvey: GREAT idea!